One of my closest friends had the best advice and encouragement for me as our move was approaching. As we were discussing the move, my fears and sadness she challenged me with the idea that Maybe God was doing this to give me a fresh start. That maybe everything I had in Roseville, our community, church, friends, experiences, trials, good times and bad was a crutch for me and that maybe God needed to remove me from my safety bubble to really grow me and use me.
I literally go back to this conversation on a daily basis, I think about it, pray about it, contemplate it and challenge myself with it.
My husband and I always joke about how some people are just stuck in their own little bubbles and I think we pride ourselves that we don't fit into that category...or at least I didn't think we did until I started thinking about this concept and realizing that we may not be stuck in a bubble in the same sense that we tease (lovingly of course) about that I can easily say that I was safe and happy and content in a bubble before we moved. We loved our community, our church, family, friends and while I would have never admitted it we were in a safety bubble.
I never expected for God to move so swiftly in changing our hearts, putting pieces into place and moving us to Washington. While it was something we had always wanted in the long term I think we were so focused on our bubble and the comforts inside of it that we didn't see God working around us as He got ready to pop that bubble.
We are out of that bubble now. We just recently found a church that we think can call home, we aren't serving in any major capacity at this point, we don't get to see some of our best friends on a regular basis, I don't have several playdate/ coffee dates set up every week, I am away from my family, Im not working.....and so many other aspects of our life are completely different than they were 4 months ago.
It is a really hard thing to admit to yourself that you have crutches. We all have them and in the light of day when you are going about your routine and have your smile on it is very easy to hide them.
To think that maybe my crutches (while they weren't necessarily bad things) defined me in a way that God didn't want makes me thankful that He blessed our family with a fresh start.
A fresh start that could take us anywhere He wants as long as we are listening and responding to His voice.
My prayer today is that as I look at this fresh start that I would carve out the time necessary and deserved to spend with Him so that I can hear Him, so that I am close to Him. So that when He says go or as He opens doors I am able to hear Him and see the path He has for me.
